Be Unapologetically Yourself: My Solitary New Year’s Resolution

A therapist of mine used the phrase “be unapologetically yourself” one day, and it truly changed my view of myself. That phrase does NOT mean you have carte blanche to do whatever your heart’s desire – what it does mean is that you should be true to yourself, and so long as you aren’t hurting anyone, you should live your best, authentic life. That is my 2026 intention.

Now, if you’ve been following this blog for a while (thank you!!), you know that I do not make resolutions. So, truthfully, this is more of an intention than a resolution. I can’t get on board with resolutions – I’m enough of an all-or-nothing person that I wave the white flag of defeat at the first signs of failing to strictly adhere to my resolutions. With an intention, I have the same resolve as a resolution, just without the guilt. If you do insist on making resolutions, I strongly suggest that you leave your ego at the door and leave yourself some wiggle room.

As I’ve said, I don’t make resolutions because I invariably break them in small (and large) ways and wind up feeling like a failure: I screw up, so I give up. What I try to keep in mind when making intentions is that much can be learned from failing.

If people viewed resolutions as living, breathing things with minds of their own, I think there would be less self-shaming and more being unapologizing ourselves. Remember, there is rarely a need to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Note that the Beast that is suicidality loves failed resolutions – anything that makes you question your worth, yourself.

Breaking resolutions sets the stage for shame, self-recrimination, and guilt. Remember that blowing a particular resolution doesn’t mean going belly up and crying “uncle.” Instead, using the broken resolution for good – for renewing and redoubling your efforts – you’ve lost one battle, but you have by no means lost the war. Having the endgame in mind can turn one small failure into a bigger success.

For those of us who fight to keep the Beast that is suicide at bay, New Year’s resolutions are especially fraught with difficulties and pitfalls. Remember, the Beast wants us to fail – it’s important not to hand it carte blanche.

You might be scratching your head right about now. Why do I associate the Beast with being unapologetically yourself? It’s simple, really: the more you can be unapologetically yourself, the more you can own your successes and failures without feeling like an emotional pincushion. And, the more you will be able to combat overwhelming feelings of failure and use them as a springboard to battle the Beast.